


A Devil's Deal

by CopperCaravan



Category: Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Fenera Mahariel, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-29
Updated: 2015-07-29
Packaged: 2018-04-11 23:20:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4456406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CopperCaravan/pseuds/CopperCaravan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mahariel had let him go, sent Nathaniel Howe away with a box of mementos and his life. And he'd come back for more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Devil's Deal

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

But Nathaniel Howe is very serious. “I want to stay, to join you,” he says.

Anders starts laughing. “Well at least he’s done trying to kill you, Commander.”

That remains to be seen.

“I let you go, Howe. What are you doing?” Mahariel’s knife stays in its sheath, but she doesn’t move her hand from the grip. Just in case. She’s not lived this long by letting her guard down.

“I...” But he’s just as lost. _He doesn’t know what he’s doing here,_ she realizes. _He’s just searching for some sense in all this. And there’s none to be found here—not with the Wardens, not with me._

She opens her mouth to tell him so, but he continues. “I thought I wanted revenge, but I... don’t. I don’t know if—” And again, he stops. She can’t expect him to go on, to face the horrors committed by his family, to forgive the woman who killed his father and lives in his home and holds sway over his people. “I just want to do something good.”

And she knows she’s lost this battle— _not the first one,_ she thinks, _and not the last._

“Careful,” Oghren says, nudging her hip. “This one’ll go all Zevran on you.”

She’d laugh if it weren’t so true.

She inspires the worst kind of loyalty. Nathaniel Howe has no idea.

Zevran’s been on the run for over a year now, dodging every Crow in Antiva trying to claim his freedom. He’s been attacked, shunned, sold-out, and poisoned. He’d killed his friend—his lover, even—to protect her and he doesn’t even have a place to call home.

Alistair’s off killing darkspawn near Ostagar, knee-deep in Hurlock filth, when he could be a king. He could be sitting on a throne in satin clothes sipping wine and making Ferelden a better place for his people, and for hers, but he’s not.

Creators only know where Morrigan is—pregnant with the soul of the monster that started this whole mess, all to save Alistair, to save her. Morrigan’s lost her mother, lost her home, lost the only friends she’s ever had and even at the end of it all, she’d declared Mahariel her friend, her kin.

And Oghren—she’d killed his first wife and he’d rewarded her with unwavering support. He’d left the only home he’d ever known, left his chance to regain his status among his people, given up any hope of ever returning to them, instead to battle things impossible. And when he’d finally found a scrap of happiness with Felsi, he’d come after her again—sold his soul to her and the Wardens and she’d let him because she’d been so afraid to go on alone.

And when she’d found Nathaniel Howe in that prison cell, when she’d realized who he was, she’d wanted him as far away from her as possible—not for her sake, but for his.

And Fen’Harel take her, he’d just run right back!

“Howe, you don’t want this. You don’t know—”

“I do know! I do. I want...” He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath. Then he’s on his knees before her—a vulnerable place, to be sure. “I pledge myself to your service.”

_Just like Zevran, all right._ Killing his father wasn’t enough apparently. She must take his life as well.

“Get up Nathaniel; we’ve got a long way to go.” She holds out her hand to him and, slightly to her surprise, he takes it.

There’s no guarantee that he isn’t just trying to get in close, to gain her trust and slit her throat. But she’s made her choice and he’s made his. And what is she to do when she needs the bodies and he needs revenge? Or even atonement? Turn him away? It had worked so well the first time, after all. She doesn’t bother being suspicious—Oghren will keep an eye on him and she doesn’t have the time or the energy or even the drive to watch her back these days. She’s too busy watching her front, keeping her eyes on the monsters she can recognize.

So he falls into line and she leads them back to Vigil’s Keep.

And when he says “thank you,” she stays silent.


End file.
